What other non-paying job has the hours of 24/7?
Before kids, how many of your vacations were actually RELAXING?
Are we all going deaf, or do we HAVE to crank the volume of the
TV, radio, iPod just to hear it over our kids’ chatter, screams, arguments?
How many things on your “TO DO” list don’t get done at night (when you vowed
to do them) because once the children are in bed, you just want to veg?
How often do you have to re-run the washing machine because you forgot to
empty a load into the dryer and it got smelly?
When you’re upstairs, and your husband is downstairs with the kids, and
you suddenly hear all hell breaking loose, do you say to yourself, “So glad
I’m not “IT”?
Ever opened a fattening food (or alcoholic drink) and thought, “I don’t care;
after spending the last 12 hours with the kids, I NEED this”?
When your kids are playing together and you hear one of them start crying,
is your first reaction to roll your eyes? You’re normal.
Would you pass out if your child ever listened to you the FIRST time you asked
him to do something?
Doesn’t it get annoying trying to figure out what dinner is going to be each
night?
Which would you rather do: Take all of your kids to the grocery store or
kiss a wasp?
Is there REALLY such a thing as a clean house?
Is there REALLY such a thing as a clean CAR?
Who likes when it’s time to apply sunscreen?
Who likes the trash her kids get in birthday party goodie bags?
Does it ever seem like your husband is another one of your children?
At what (sad) point do we become “Mom and Dad” instead of “Mommy and Daddy?”
Anyone else tired of picking up shoes all over the house?
Anyone else tired of looking for OTHER PEOPLE’S shoes (that they’ve
left all over the house and now can’t find when it’s time to walk out
the door to school, practice, church, playground …)?
Which is better at the end of the day: wine or chocolate?
Which is better at the end of the day: silence or silence?
Is there any GOOD reason for the way every toy is tied, knotted, bound into
its box when you first open it? I think Santa has developed OCD over the years …
There’s really no such thing as not being tired, is there?
How many times has a complete stranger (usually an old woman) stopped you
in a store, gazed adoringly at your kids, and ordered you to “Enjoy these
years”?
When your kids are playing nicely together, do you try to hide quietly
somewhere?
Do your kids play nicely together until the moment you pick up the phone?
Universal, it seems.
What hurts more: when your child bounds into your lap, elbows flying …
or when she no longer wants to sit there?
… I don’t know the answer to that last one yet, so I’m trying every day to
listen to the cotton-head in the store who told me to enjoy them. Then I put
them to bed and choose between wine and chocolate.
The World of Author/Mom Alicia Murphy! 
Should we have to choose between wine & chocolate?!!